Abacoa & Alton Neighbors - June 2026

14 A B A C O A & A LT O N N E I G H B O R S | J U N E 2 0 2 6 When you can give full attention to the other person across the table, magic will happen. Psychiatrist Dr. Mark Goulston, in his book Just Listen, suggests “Make the other person feel ‘felt’.” Making someone” feel felt” simply means putting yourself in the other person's shoes so you can connect at a deep and emotional level. So, how do we improve our listening? First, stop thinking of the conversation as a tennis match. You talk, then I tell you all I know, then you talk, and then I do it again. I must confess, I was guilty of the tennis math concept. For me, I took the advice of the famous detective Columbo. I started to be more curious, asking more open-ended questions, and then staying locked in to the answers. Your objective is to make the person feel they are the most important person in your world at that moment. People will follow a leader who sees them, understands them, and makes them feel important. Listening intentionally will be long-lasting in developing leaders. Bob Fashano is the founder of Lead One Consulting, LLC, an executive Coaching and Leadership Development Company located in Palm Beach Gardens. Bob Is a certified Executive Coach from the Center for Executive Coaching and a member of the International Coaching Federation. He is the author of a recently released book, "Make Today Your Masterpiece" and a new book to be released in the fourth quarter of 2026. He serves on the Keiser Flagship Advisory Counsel. - By Bob Fashano - F For those who have read my content in the past, know that I am an advocate of a “one-on-one” session with team members. I believe investing some focused time is a lasting ingredient for growth and development. When you are leading, you are a “coach/ leader.” Your coaching objective is to help your people learn and improve their performance. Telling people what to do doesn’t sustain growth-if it did, our leadership world would be simple, wouldn’t it? In one-on-one sessions, I have 5 components: ASK, LISTEN, COACH, PRAISE, CHALLENGE. Let me be clear, this is not a performance review. You will invest most of your time in the ASK and LISTEN components. Typically, this is where you help and guide them Listening to discover solutions. For example: 20% asking, 80% listening. In fact, there is an old Chinese proverb that speaks to this: “I HEAR, AND I FORGET. I SEE, AND I REMEMBER. I DO, AND I UNDERSTAND.” When you ask questions that move people to discover their abilities and growth opportunities, behavior will change, and results will emerge. I love Ashley Montagu’s powerful truth with this quote: “IN TEACHING, IT IS THE METHOD AND NOT THE CONTENT THAT IS THE MESSAGE-THE DRAWING OUT, NOT THE PUMPING IN." Interestingly, carefully asked open-ended questions have become a lost art. As a leader, you are very busy with deadlines, meetings, financial matters…the list goes on. We can easily become victims of the “Tyranny of the Urgent.” Oftentimes, if you are not careful, the most important people get the “short end “of the stick and are not really listened to. Of course, that is not a lasting formula for helping people grow. As a result, due to the pressures of the day, we tend to tell, inform, and cut to the chase. However, what is lasting is when our people learn, internalize, and practice what they discover for themselves. THE LOST ART “IN TEACHING, IT IS THE METHOD AND NOT THE CONTENT THAT IS THE MESSAGE-THE DRAWING OUT, NOT THE PUMPING IN." Keiser University – Flagship Campus